No
one knows how much a mother loves her children. There’s no measuring instrument
that can measure it. For as long as she’s breathing, there exist the words
‘immesurable and unconditional love’.
For
an ordinary child, life is about playing, running around with some friends and
enjoying life’s greatest gifts and treasures. But for a nine-year-old Riza
Astute who’s suffering under the curse of heart deficiency and having a weak
lungs, life is an endless struggle in finding the cure for her sickness. Beside
her is a loving mother, who never fails to encourage her in fighting her
sickness, cries with her, and most importantly, her mother that never left her
when she needed her the most.
Mom,
I wanna give up. Let’s give this fight up,” she said, crying. They had been in
the hospital for almost three months already, waiting for the cure.
No
Baby, the doctor said there’s still a cure,” her mother cried while giving her
a tight hug. A hug that assured her about not giving up. An assurance of the cure
that had long been waited.
There’s
no cure Mom, why can’t we just accept it?” sadness colored the tone of her
trembling voice, her mother never loosen the tightness of the hug.
The
doctor said that the heart transplant will going to work. Just… don’t give up.
Please Baby, for me,” her mother pleaded, sobbing. She saw the naked panic in
her eyes.
But
there’s no heart donor,” her voice grown higher, trying to be more reasonable
as she could be.
Yes
there is,” she fell silent, replaying her mother’s words in her mind. “The
doctor said she’s right in the operating room now, so they’re going to send you
to the O.R,” she continued.
Like
who the hell would going to give her own life for a worthless dying child. For
Pete’s sake Mom,” she said, tears welled up, she reached up to wipe them away
before they could spill over.
I
don’t know. Let’s be thankful that there’s a donor. I’m going to thank her with
all my life, and I’m going to spend all our money to win you back.” She kissed
her daughter’s forehead.
Before
she could respond her thank you words, three nurse got in the room and took her
to the operating room.
They
had injected her loads of anaesthetic medicines which made her close her watery
eyes and fell into silent, dreamy sleep.
The
operation took a little over five hours longer than it should be and was
successful. Thanks be to her heart donor and of course, to God.
It
took three days before she finally woke up. She saw her family looking at her
anxiously, wide eyed. She searched for her mother but couldn’t find her.
Where’s
Mom?” she asked when finally, she’d regained her strength and consciousness.
At
the house, taking a sleep,” her brother was the one to answer the question.
I
wanna see Mom.” Her voice was rather a command than a request.
Sure
you can?
Yeah!
Perfectly sure. I wanna get out of this white place.
Well
then,I’m going to pay for the bills,” replied her father.
When
she got home – excited by the thought of coming home again and seeing her
mother – she was shocked to see too many people – most of them were their
neighbors – crowding their place. She felt a sudden surge of panic flooding
through her, her pulse was thudding in her ears. She put one arm over her
heart. It drummed hyperactively over her palm.
She
wheeled her wheelchair, entering the front door. She saw her grandparents
crying, mourning over a dead body lying inside the coffin. She went directly
into it and cried as she saw the face of her lifeless mother under the glass of
the coffin, sleeping peacefully,smiling to her.
She
died really happy…” she flinched when she saw her father on her side, she felt
the need of hugging him, “… she died really happy giving you her heart.” That
stung her. She shouted NO, but the words slithered out of her mouth in a silent
– almost unheard – whisper. She fell on her wobbling knees and leaned her head
closer to her mother’s as another wave of ache and sadness washed over her.